HEAVY METAL
The warrior arrives on a Harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers, and bones the princess.

POWER METAL
The warrior arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.

THRASH METAL
The warrior arrives with a frayed denim jacket, fights the dragon, saves the princess and ****s her.

VIKING METAL
The warrior arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings, and burns the castle before leaving.

DEATH METAL
The warrior arrives, kills the dragon, rapes the princess in the mouth and kills her, then leaves.

BLACK METAL
The warrior arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.

GORE METAL
The warrior arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, ****s the princess and kills her. Then he ****s the dead body, slashes her belly, and eats her guts. Then he ****s the carcass again, burns the corpse, and ****s it for the last time.

GRIND METAL
The warrior arrives, screams something completely incoherent for about 30 seconds, and then leaves.

DOOM METAL
The warrior arrives, sees the size of the dragon, and thinks he could never beat him. He gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragons eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.

GOTHIC METAL
The warrior in a velvet costume starts singing soprano. The protagonist completes the duet by adding the beast part, while the dragon plays the flute. Suddenly the dragon swallows the flute and accidently scorches the beauty and the beast and suffocates to death. All their souls are damned in hell for all eternity.

PROGRESSIVE METAL
The warrior arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives at the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the HEAVY METAL protagonist.

INDUSTRIAL METAL
The warrior arrives wearing a greasy overcoat, makes an obscene gesture towards the dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.

SPEED METAL
Suddenly there, short solo, dragon is confused, someone's screaming weird stuff, princess realizes she's been deflowered, dragon and princess are still looking for the one who did this.

CHRISTIAN METAL
The warrior rides in on his way home from church and sings a mushy power ballad to the dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is immediately converted, and when the princess wants to "thank" the protagonist he replies, "sorry, but I don't believe in having sex before marriage".

GLAM METAL
The warrior arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make-up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink color.

NU METAL
The warrior arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.

EMO
The warrior sees the dragon and moans about how hard it will be to get the princess to fall in love with him. He gets eaten. The princess is very happy, because he was a whiny fag anyway.

they are still confusing but this is funny and I found it on my myspace bulletin so enjoy all girls and guys it is called "61 things girls don't know about guys" but to me I think that we know at least some of these but this was written by one of my guy friends so it might be true for at least him:

1.Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them.
(Oh yeah... you're not "popular" if you've slept with more than 5 guys... you're a HOE!)

2. "Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?"
Two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone.

3. Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep,
they always think about the one girl they truly care about.

4. Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're going to say so there aren't awkward pauses,
but once he's on the phone, he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes.

5. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile. =]

6. Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him.

7. Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend
or ex love-interest. Unless they're goin for the
let-her-complain-to-you-and-then-have-her-realize-how-wonderful-and-nice-you-are method.

8. A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to.

9. Boyfriends need to be reassured often that they're still loved.

10. Don't talk about your guy friends to your boyfriend.

11. Guys get jealous easily.

12. Guys are more emotional than they'd like people to think.

13. Giving a guy a hanging message like
"You know what?! ... uh... nevermind... "
would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking
and he'll assume he did something wrong and he'll obsess about it trying to figure it out.

14. Guys are good flatterers when courting
but they usually stammer when they talk to a girl they really like.

15. Guys hate asking parents for money to buy girls presents.
So they come up with ideas like saving their lunch money for a week.
But it never works because guys are always hungry
so they end up asking the parents for money anyway.

16. Girls are guys' weaknesses.

17. Guys are very open about themselves.

18. It's good to test a guy first before you trust him.
But don't let him wait too long.

19. Your best friend, whom your boyfriend seeks help from about his problems with you,
may end up being admired by your boyfriend.

20. If a guy tells you about his problems,
he just needs someone to listen to him.
You don't need to give advice.

21. A usual act that proves that the guy likes you
is when he teases you.

22. Guys love you more than you love them
if they are serious in your relationships.

23. Guys will brag about anything.

24. Guys use words like "hot" or "cute" to describe girls.
We rarely use "beautiful" or "pretty".
If a guy uses that, he likes you a whole hell of a lot.

25. Guys think WAY too much. One small thing a girl does,
even if she doesn't notice it, can make the guy think about it for hours,
trying to figure out what it meant.

26. Guys seek for advice from girls not other guys.
Because most guys think alike, so if one guy's confused,
then we're all confused.

27. Any guy could write out a rulebook or advice book for flirting,
but no guy can write out a book about relationships.

28. Try to be as straight-forward as possible.

29. A guy has to experience rejection,
because if he's too-good-never-been-busted,
never been in love and hurt, he won't be mature and grow up.

30. If the guy does something stupid in front of the girl,
he will think about it for the next couple days
or until the next time he spends time with the girl.

31. No matter how much guys talk about asses and boobs,
personality is key.

32. Guys learn from experience. Not from the romance books
that girls read and take as their basis of experience.

33. Guys worry about the thin line between being compassionate and being whipped.

34. If a guy looks un

English:

Don't make fun of it,
Don't destroy it,
Don't cheapen it.
That one special thing that everyone has.
My love, my dream, and you.
I won't let those go no matter what.
On those nights when you can't settle down no matter what you do
You feel like throwing it all away.
Don't say a word, just open the door,
I don't have time to quibble with you.
I wanna fly all over the place,
I wanna throw caution to the wind!
I haven't lost anything,
I haven't even started yet.
Don't make fun of it,
Don't destroy it,
Don't cheapen it,
That one special thing that everyone has.
My love, my dream, and you.
I won't let those go no matter what.
Whatta ya want?
What do ya wanna do?
Where do you want to go?
Grab what you want and rip through the dark as you run Through The Night!
I was off my guard towards your kindness,
But I was frightened at times
I did whatever I wanted to do
But I prefer your heart.
I believe, I want to believe, I want to distinguish between black & white.
It's not only intensity, it's not only kindness--so
Don't make fun of it,
Don't destroy it,
Don't cheapen it,
Who do you want to embrace?
I think you know.
Only love,
only dreams,
only you.
I can't even protect it. I have to start moving.
Even if I am hurt, even if I hurt you, even if I make a detour.
As you/I please, as you/I tumble, run through the night!
Don't make fun of it,
Don't destroy it,
Don't cheapen it,
That one special thing that everyone has.
My love,
my dream,
and you.
I won't let those go no matter what
Embracing, hurting, losing
Everyone realises their precious things,
At any rate, promises, restraints.
Whatta ya want?
What do ya wanna do?
Where do you want to go?
Grab what you want and rip through the dark as you run Through The Night!