Little Johnny was 7 years old and like
other boys
his age rather curious. He had been
hearing quite
a bit
about 'making out' from the older boys,
and he
wondered what it was and how it was
done. One
day he took his question to his mother,
who
became rather flustered. Instead of
explaining
things to Johnny, she told him to hide
behind the
curtains one night and watch his older
sister and
her boyfriend.

This he did.

The following morning, Johnny described
EVERYTHING
to his mother.

"Sis and her boyfriend sat and talked for
a while,
then he turned off most of the lights.
Then he
started kissing and hugging her. I
figured 'Sis
must be getting sick, because her face
started
looking funny. He must have thought so
too,
because he put his hand inside her
blouse to feel
her heart, just the way the doctor would.
Except
he's not as smart as the doctor because he
seemed to have trouble finding her heart.
I guess
he was getting sick too, because pretty
soon both
of them started panting and getting all
out of
breath. His other hand must have been
cold
because he put it under her skirt. About
this
time 'Sis got worse and began to moan
and sigh
and squirm around and slide down
toward the end
of the couch. This was when her fever
started. I
knew it was a fever, because Sis told him
she felt
really hot. Finally, I found out what was
making
them so sick-a big eel had gotten inside
his pants
somehow. It just jumped out of his pants
and
stood there, about 10 inches long,
honest, anyway
he grabbed it in one hand to keep it from
getting
away. When Sis saw it, she got really
scared-her
eyes got big, and her mouth fell open,
and she
started calling out to God and stuff like
that. She
said it was the biggest one she's ever
seen; I
should tell her about the ones down at
the lake by
our house! Anyway, Sis got brave and
tried to kill
the eel by biting its head off. All of a
sudden she
grabbed it with both hands and held it
tight while
he took a muzzle out of his pocket and
slipped it
over the eel's head to keep it from biting
again. Sis
lay back and spread her legs so she could
get a
scissor-lock on it and he helped by lying
on top of
the eel. The eel put up a hell of a fight.
Sis started
groaning and squealing and her
boyfriend almost
upset the couch. I guess they wanted to
kill the
eel by squashing it between them. After a
while
they both quit moving and gave a great
sigh. Her
boyfriend got up, and sure enough, they
killed the
eel. I knew because it just hung there,
limp, and
some of its insides were hanging out. Sis
and her
boyfriend were a little tired from the
battle, but
they went back to courting anyway. He
started
hugging
and kissing her again. By golly, the eel
wasn't
dead! It jumped straight up and started to
fight
again. I guess eels are like cats- they
have nine
lives or something. This time, Sis jumped
up and
tried to kill it by sitting on it. After about a
35
minute struggle, they finally killed the
eel. I
knew it was dead, because I saw Sis's
boyfriend
peel its
skin off and flush it down the toilet.

1.Did anyone see you kiss the last person you kissed?
Yeah 2 many

2. Do you still talk to the person you kissed last?
a bit

3. Have you ever punched a tree?
no i chopped 1 down but

4. Do you believe that if you want something bad enough you'll get it?
If u work hard enuf for it.
5. Do you watch a lot of TV?
nah

6. Have you tried ecstasy?
nah

7. Have you ever snuck out of your house?
dont have to sneak out

8. Kill or Be killed?
dunno ask me later

9. Break someone's heart or have your heart broken?
Both at the same time .... beter that way

10. Never sleep or never eat?
never sleep there is enuf time for that when ur dead

11. Who was the last person you couldn't take your eyes off?
jennifer hawkins

12. Would you ever get a tattoo?
lol

13. Who was the last person you had a dream about?
cant remember really

14. Are you a morning person or a night person?
NIGHTT ... PARTY

15. What's the meanest thing you've ever done to someone?
put them in hospital

16. Have you ever flashed someone?
yeah

17. Do you snore?
wen im drunk i think
18. Have you ever gotten a hickey?
yeah
19. Do you know anyone who has gotten an abortion?
No

20. What would you do if you opened up your front door to a dead body?
"wat happened last nite again?"
21. Have you ever kissed in the rain?
nah but sounds cool
23. Are you there for your friends?
yeah when i can
25. Do you like to spend time with people?
yeah but i do like aaron time
27. Are you hungry?
nah just ate
28. Are you a forgiving person?
might be depends
29. Do you walk with your eyes open or closed?
ur blind wen ur drunk so yeah on occasions
30. Do you drink every weekend?
nah every nite just about its cheap here
31. When was the last time you did the dishes?
tonite
32. Are you talking to anyone while doing this?
nah

33. Do you want a relationship right now?
cant really have 1 im 2 iscolated so nah
34. What are you about to do?
open another drink
35. Have you ever thought someone died, when they really didn't?
yep
36. Have you ever fallen down a set of stairs?
yeah kinda
37. Your name plus "ness"?
Aaronness thats weird
38. Two feelings at the moment?
thirsty, happy
39.What are you listening to right now?
the tv in the next room
40. Done anything you regret so far in life?
yeah
41. Where are you right now?
staff computer roo Alexandria Station y who wants 2 know
42. The highlight of your week?
the whole week
43. What are you craving to have right now?
smoke
44. Who were the last people you ate with?
work mates
45. What are you scared of?
not much
46. Last movie you watched?
nemo last night

47. Last song you sang out loud?
rock star by nickelback
48. Are you thinking of someone right now?
every1 at home always do
49. Who is the last person you talked to?
budgie
50. Last thing you download on your computer?
none of ur business lol

AuSsIe PrIdE
>AUSSIE PRIDE!
>
>
> Being Australian is about driving in a German car to an Irish Pub for a
> Belgian Beer, then, grabbing an Indian Curry or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.
>
> Only in Australia can a pizza get to your house faster than an Ambulance.
>
> Only in Australia do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their medicines,while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front of the store.
>
> Only in Australia are there disable parking places in front of a skating
> rink.
>
>
> NOT TO MENTION
>
> 3 Aussies die each year testing if a 9 volt battery works on their tongues.
>
> 142 Aussies were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
>
> 58 Aussies are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
> screwdrivers.
>
> 31 Aussies have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas treewhile the
> fairy lights were plugged in.
>
> 8 Aussies had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit
> cigarette in their mouth.
>
> A massive 543 Aussies were admitted to Emergency in the last two years after
> opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
>
> And finally......
>
> In 2000 eight Aussies cracked their skull while throwing up in the toilet.
>
>IF YOUR PROUD 2 BE AUSSIE PUT THIS ON YOUR BLOG!