>A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
>
>A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.
>
>A snail can sleep for three years.
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>All Polar bears are left-handed.
>
>American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first-class.
>
>Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.
>
>An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
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>Babies are born without knee caps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.
>
>Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
>
>Butterflies taste with their feet.
>
>Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds, dogs only have about ten.
>
>Cat's urine glows under a black light.
>
>China has more English speakers than the United States.
>
>Donald Duck comics were banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants.
>
>Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.
>
>Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.
>
>Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie.
>
>February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.
>
>Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
>
>I am. is the shortest complete sentence in the English language
>
>If Barbie were life-size, her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet, two inches tall and have a neck twice the length of a normal human's neck.
>
>If the population of China walked past you in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.
>
>If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
>
>If you keep a goldfish in a dark room, it will eventually turn white.
>
>If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
>
>In ancient Egypt, priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes.
>
>In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.
>
>It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.
>
>Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.
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>Marilyn Monroe had six toes.
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>Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.
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>More people are killed by donkeys annually than are killed in plane crashes.
>
>No word in the English language rhymes with month.
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>Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.
>
>On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.
>
>One of the reasons marijuana is illegal today is because cotton growers in the '30s lobbied against hemp farmers, they saw it as competition.
>
>Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.
>
>Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.
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>Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people do.
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>Shakespeare invented the word "assassination" and "bump."
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>Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
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>Starfish haven't got brains.
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>Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.
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>The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.
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>The average human eats eight spiders in their lifetime at night.
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>The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
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>The cruise liner, Queen Elizabeth 2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.
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>The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
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>The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
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>The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
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>The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
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>The name of all the continents end with the same letter that they start with.
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>The name Wendy was made up for the book "Peter Pan."
>
>The Pentagon, in Arlington, Virginia, has t

HOLLY -- e.g. "I gave it holly"---I put a fair bit of effort into it.

B0LLIX----Pat Spillane or any kerry players or supporters

MIGHTY---Very good

HAMES---A right **** e-e.g.-"He made a hames of that chance"

TIMBER---Intimidation of a hurling opponent - e.g.- "Show him some timber"

LAMP----A good thump---e.g.-"I swung for the sliotar, missed by 3 feet and lamped the full back"

A CROWD---A gathering of people who watch a match and hope for random acts
of violence -e.g-Meath supporters

SCHKELP---To remove living tissue in the absence of surgical procedures -- e.g. "That whore from Tipp took a schkelp outta me leg"

HATCHET MAN---Mountainy type, uses hunter/gatherer instincts

BULLIN'---Angry-e.g-"The centre half was bullin' after I lamped him"

BULL THICK---Very angry-e.g.-"The centre half was bull thick after I lamped him again"

JOULT---A push-e.g.-"I gave him ! a joult and he has to wear a neck brace for 2 weeks"

THE COMM-A-TEEE---Local GAA bullshitters in general

BUSHTED---An undefined soreness-e.g.-"Jayz me arm is bushted"

THE BOMBER---Popular name for a fat hairy GAA player

A HANG SANGWIDGE---Consumed with "tay" on the sides of roads after matches in Croker or Thurles, usually contains half a pound of butter

RAKE-A great amount of anything, usually pints of Guinness the night before an important match

INDANAMAJAYSUS (in-da-nama-Jaysus)--! -What was that for referee?

YA B0LLIX YA---Corner back's formal recognition of a score by his opponent

LEH-IT-IN-TA-FcuK-WUD-YA---Full forwards appeal to a midfielder for a more timely delivery of the pass

MULLOCKER---Untidy or awkward player released for matches

BURST THE B0LLIX---Instructions from the sideline to tackle your man

ROW---Disagreement involving four or more players

MASSIVE ROW---Disagreement involving both teams, including goalies, substitutes and supporters jumping fences

ALL-HELL-BROKE-LOOSE---A massive row that continues out in the parking area or
dressing room areas, usually resolved by the Gardai

Dear Blog
Who da fuck r u...
Stay out of my life..
I never want to see you again...

Yours Faithfully
James