For all those who have been living under a rock, there is a conspiracy theroy amongst American Football fans that the athlete that appears on EA's annual release "Madden" franchise will either A. get injured the next season, or B. Perform like shit in the next season.

However my Madden curse is much more dire. (7 match losing streak to be precise)
And no its not becuase I'm gonna be on the cover of Madden 2010 (pffftttt as if that would ever happen) its something were anything that could possibly go wrong in a game of Madden will without a dout happen to me while im playing.

I'll admit that Im not the best player in Naenae but when shit happens to you like it does too me, it just sucks a whole lot of dog shit. And im reguarly playing against this guy called Tama, yeah you may know him. He could read you the NFL rule book to you backwards.

So this is why Im turning gray, balding, and emo.

Its early in the 4th quater. I have a 7 point lead. Tama has the ball (He's the Browns with Mr Anderson by the way and I'm the Broncos, random teams FTW) and he scrambles out of the pocket only to put his foot out on the touchback line. SAFETY!!! (worth two points, just like a conversion for all the rugby nutz out there.)so its now 16-7 to me.

2 minute warning comes around and Tama has used all his time outs and is on his own 5 yard line. Game won right? I mean he's got to score twice to win and has no-time outs left and has to travel the whole field to get a TD. Right?

ERRR!!! WRONG!!!

And thats the End of the blog.
Thanks for reading.

Nah jokes I'll tell ya what happened tommorow. What? You wanna hear now? Okay then....

He throws a short pass to his monster tight end you is about 20 feet tall and weighs in heavier then a whale. I take control of the defender and get completley run over. (A.K.A Lomu over Catt.) So what does the computer controlled defender decide to do. Oh well he thought this would be the perfect time to pull out a face mask. Yeah good call captain fucking dickhead. So now he's up to about halfway becuase of one play that should have only gone for about 10 yards.

Long story short, he ended up scoring a TD to Cribbs who was wide open in the endzone. Like WIDE OPEN. like it woulda taken my defence 5 weeks to get withen 10 yards of him, wide open.

Its now 16-14 to me still.

Onside kicks hardly ever work, so im still in the drivers seat. So Tama takes about a year and a half to kick it. (Play clock was on 0, not sure on the rulling of that though) and someone from my team wraps the ball up with some christmas paper and pops aon a pretty little ribbon for good measure and says "here you can have it cause im such a faggot and remember to vote Obama"

But he still has no time-outs so Im still gonna rack up a big fat W and take back the trophy. He makes it up the field to about the 40 yard line on my side. with about 30 seconds to go, time running he completes a pass to some unknowen dude, but he's still out of feild goal range and he was taken down in field so the times still ticking away. And out of the blue the timeout icon appears and his fucking pussey arse player is faking an injury. What are the chances of that buillshit happening so now the clock is stopped cuase he wants to have a little cry about how he was abused as a child.

When shit like that happens to you, you know you aint gonna win, and what happened, Yep he got the field goal and won. WTF!!!!

Other bull-shit that has occured only when I seem to play is the ball going straight through my reciever's hands, litterally, like spawning through his hands! and heaps of those Im a quater back running backwards looking at my own goal post's but its all good because I can spin around 360 degrees and throw it into triple covergae for a TD plays happen against me. I also seem to be on the wrong side of the reffs aswell.

Hopefully my next blog will be about me winning. But dont hold your breath as this curse is gonna overstay its

So it was 7:00am and like most people in this world I woke up!!! And this time I didn't wake up feeling like your mums arse. I think that was because I fell asleep pretty early watching the Olympics. Speaking of the Olympics, did anyone see that Hungarian weight lifter!!! Fark that shit, Betcha that would have tickled for ages.

any who its now 7:35 and its time to catch the train to Natcoll. Unfortunately the train wasn't too packed which meant no free ride. Love it when ya get a free ride.

8:20: Now in Wellington, the best city in the world.........on a sunny day that it. But today it was hurling down. Ya see in Wellington it is very easy too look out of place. So heres a guide on how to look like a “townie”. Walk as fast as your legs will allow, walk across the road even when it has the red man light, and always have your head down or be talking on a cell phone. if you can accomplish all that, you will fit right in.

So just as I was getting my townie groove on, I hear my name being called. But because I'm so Shit hot I take no notice as I get that all the time. (disclaimer: that bits not actually true) But I look around and what do ya know. A big blast from the past. Its ol Venu Masoe. You know the guy that had that loud obnoxious laugh and could sing like Reuben Staddard. And get this, He's temping and a bank, BNZ to be precise. So a one time student from Naenae college is actually working at a bank. Let him be an inspiration to us all.

So I get to Natcoll. But i'm a bit late, but who giza shit coz I'm a straight rebel. But todays a very important day, as our first formative has to be handed in. Its just designing a news letter for a travel place.

But when I open up my saved document in "InDesign" It says that its is missing fonts, which like set me back 10mins. coz some dumb fucker deactivated some of the fonts I used. Gosh doesn't anyone here care about my travel newsletter that ain't even gonna affect my overall mark. But in the end I got is sorted.

So it was time to print. But we had to print it on an A3 page, and have it duplecse, so we can fold the A3 into 2 A4's and have the newsletter on both sides of the A3 page. If that sounded more confusing then KB's, MB's and GB's well then how do you think I felt I had to print this darn thing. But what do ya know, playing around with the printing options like a headless chook actually payed off and it printed correctly the first time!

Hold ya horses though. Coz we ain't home and hosed yet. My bloody page number's are all mixed up. 1, 3, 2, 4 doesn't make sense to most. So I had to fix that up and re-print it again. So now that I had the final product in my hand, I handed it over to ma main man Dean to proof it for me. When ma main man Dean came back the only complaint he had was about the hyphenation. thats one of these - for all you uninformed. (Retards) I set the limit to 2 for the whole document and yet there were about 4 on the front page alone. Fucken Adobe programmers need to sort that shit out.

Lunch-time. Normally to most people its the best time of the day but window shopping in town doesn't sound very "best time of the day" to me. I mean why was I even window shopping. I didn't have any money on me, shit I didn't even have my little green plastic card on me (Kiwi banks the only way to go people). But at least the weather was better and right now Wellywood was the best city in the world.

I decided to walk down labpton Quay, looking like a townie I may add. On my way down down I saw a couple of the Counties Manakau players, and being a little bit, just a little bit into rugby I contemplated the thought of getting there signatures. But I didn't reconzie there faces so they must of been bench players. And I don't wont no bench signature.

So I popped into EBsman. (Gamesman and EB joined forces, how g@y) to see if they had Madden 09........Fail, they didn't there PS3 stock in yet.

Glance down at my cell phone, not a watch, who ha

1. Yo mama so fat, when GOD said let there be light, she moved her butt.

2. Yo mamma so fat I took a picture of her last christmas and its still printing.

3. Yo mama so fat she’s got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book.

4. Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.

5. Yo mama so fat, when she goes to KFC, she asks for the bucket on the roof.

6. Yo mama so fat when she hopped on the scales, it came up “To be continued”

7. Yo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized.

8. Yo mama so fat she was born on the fourth, fifth, and sixth of March.

9. Yo mama so fat when she turns around people throw her a welcome back party.

10. Yo mama so fat when she was walking down the street and I swerved to miss her, I ran out of gas.