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	Forever Young
	She looked in the mirror and wanted to cry. No matter how she tried to hide it, she was aging rapidly. Her roots were white, she touched them up every fortnight to try and conceal it but her hair was weak. It fell out so much that she had bald patches. A thin mass of pale blonde hair struggled to conceal a bumpy scalp. The skin on her face was tracked with creases, wrinkles and crevices. She used mountains of makeup to try and disguise it but it would always seep into the creases. She stretched her skin and could plainly see the lumps of makeup caught in the fading lines. She let go and hid her hands behind her back. The mottled grey green skin on her hands was worse than the lines. Her hands told her age better than anything else could. Her knuckles were oversized and rheumatic, her fingers bent, her wrists swollen masses of fat, deep veins protruded making her skin seem almost transparent. Blue veined eyelids drooped over watery blood shot eyes that peered out from sunken sockets. Her eyebrows had stopped growing long ago, forever replaced by a shaky drawn line. Saggy cheeks bulged over a soft jaw line even as she sucked her toothless gums. Cracked lips had thinned to harsh white lines. With red lipstick her mouth looked like a tiny slash across her face. Even after they had been boosted, plumpness eventually faded away like a stolen dream. Laughter lines were no laughing matter as they divided her face with deep incisions. A picture of herself as a young girl tormented her with its smooth marble like skin, bright eyes, shiny hair and luscious pout. Her nose was a perfect slope these days. It had been broken twice. The first time was an accident. Now it was better than the one she had been born with except for the dry skin, open pores, hair and ever widening nostrils. So much money wasted. She lightly trailed one manicured nail along the scars behind her ears and under her chin. They had been worth the pain and cost for a while until nature took its course again. Loose skin hung from her chin and neck, it even wobbled when she laughed. So she stopped laughing. Her body could be hidden to a certain extent. Her breasts had still been unnaturally high a couple of years before but now the droopiness could not be avoided. Naked, she could feel her breasts lean against her lower stomach but no surgeon would touch her now. They were still hard, they just drooped unbelievably. They had to be hidden because they made people gasp in horror. One day on the beach, she heard a girl whisper to her friend that she had changed her mind about getting a boob job after seeing that. That. The girl didn’t even bother to lower her voice. She sighed to herself, still not understanding how her breasts could look that way. Her soft, plump stomach also hung low even though she didn’t have children. That was more from an operation that had gone wrong. Well, that combined with the fact she ate to feel better. Yet she never managed to feel better. Except for her dreams. She was happy there because she could look as young and beautiful as she once did. Back in the days when men chased her but she was fussy. She didn’t stay with any of them for long. Then one day it changed. Nobody wanted her anymore. The men stopped whistling at her, winking at her, smiling at her. It was then that she knew she had to make a change. Become beautiful again. But it didn’t really work now she was left in this shell of a body. Feeling like she should be beautiful but seeing an ugly hag whenever she looked into the mirror. The face looking back at her was unhappy but her dreams were magical. So she took the bottles of pills from her bag. Painkillers, sleeping pills, a whole variety of shapes, sizes and colours. She counted them all out carefully, noting the contrast between her perfectly painted fingernails and her ancient looking finger with a frown. She combed her hair, put on some makeup and her favourite dress. She played the song, “I Only Have Eyes For You” by The Flamingos on repeat. It was her favourite song because of the line, “My love must be a kind of blind love…” Humming to herself, she sat on her single bed, caressing the pills like a lover and prepared to dream for eternity.
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