Bebo

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	Peace
	I woke up not knowing where I was. A bright blue unclouded sky soared above me. Sunlight seemed to be strong yet I felt cold. Confused, I sat up slowly, looking to the side and realising I lay on the edge of a cliff. Utterly bewildered, I quickly inched my way back from the nauseatingly high edge. Strong currents lashed against rocks below, chilling my insides and making my stomach turn. The sheer height made me dizzy even though I still sat on solid ground. I sat unmoving for a few moments trying to get my bearings and noticing the dampness of my clothes. By the time I remembered where I was, my clothes were nearly dry in the heat and breeze. Bosdale Beach, I went there every summer. It was as familiar to me as my home. I shivered, more out of habit than actual cold. How long had I been here? I felt…icky, for want of a better word. I must have been sunbathing and fell asleep. Strange place to sunbathe though, considering I was afraid of heights. My Dad and sister were probably wondering where I was by now. It looked kind of late in the day; I usually left the caravan early in the morning to avoid my Dad. I was 16 and my Dad definitely didn’t understand me so I kept out of his way. I did wonder where Mike and Laurie were though. At least one of them tended to accompany me wherever I went. Mike was my twin brother and Laurie our younger sister, we sort of stuck together whenever we went on holidays with Dad. I tried in vain to remember who had come with me this morning but for some reason I couldn’t remember at all. I must have lay in the sun too long. I got annoyed as the thought occurred to me that my brother or sister had ditched me here while I slept. Idiots! Anything could have happened to me. Sighing, I pulled myself up and started walking. It was then I felt the pain pulsing through the back of my skull like something was piercing into my brain. I shuddered at the thought, wincing with the pain but perhaps there were some painkillers back in the caravan. I walked down a long winding path of sand amongst tufts of long coarse grass. I still didn’t know why I had been on the cliff in the first place. Perhaps I fell over and hit my head and lost my memory or was that just a little too fantastic to believe. I kept strolling along, not getting anywhere fast. I saw Laurie in the distance and hurried after her, calling my name. She didn’t look around; she was always in a world of her own. She walked towards the caravan, her head down and her arms crossed, nothing like the easy going bouncy stride that she preferred. I finally caught up to her, panting heavily, more out of annoyance than anything else. “Laurie, wait for me!” She didn’t even look up. “Laurie? Where did you go?” No answer. “Eh, Laurie, what are you playing at?” Still nothing. Maybe she was annoyed at me about something. “Grow up, would you? Enough with the silent treatment already!” A solitary tear rolled down one of her spectacularly freckled cheeks. Now I felt guilty, I must have done something REALLY bad to make Laurie cry. “Aw, no, Laurie, don’t cry, please? I’m sorry, whatever it is, I’m sorry for it. I don’t even remember what happened today; I just woke up by the cliffs and came straight here. Please tell me what I did.” She swiftly wiped her face with her hands and took a deep breath before lifting her head with a mournful look, something I wasn’t used to seeing on Laurie’s face. She walked away from me and straight into our caravan. I took a step backwards as if I had been struck. What on earth was that about? I frowned, became quite annoyed and stalked off. Well if she wanted to be like that, let her. She had a cheek alright, treating me like that! I picked up a stone and threw it hard at the caravan. It hit the door with a loud thud. The door flung open and my Dad stepped over the threshold looking around wildly. I was certain that he looked straight at me but he didn’t even wave. This was turning out to be one strange sort of day. I decided to walk along the local shops near the pier and found myself looking in windows full of candyfloss and red novelty lollipops. So gaudy but oh so excellent. I wasn’t hungry but I still wanted some pink candy floss. Anything that would cheer me up, I felt unusually low today. I entered the shop which was empty and approached the lady at the counter. “Can I have a bag of pink candy floss please?” I asked giving my best smile. The woman didn’t even bother to look up. I cleared my throat. Maybe she didn’t hear me. “Some candyfloss please?” I called a little louder. Okay, still nothing, what was with everyone today? This was frustrating, why was everyone acting so rudely? “Fine then!” I shouted and pushed over a stand of postcards in anger. The lady’s head instantly shot up in surprise. She looked at me in terror, her hands actually started shaking. I knew people were nervous of teenagers but this was ridiculous. “Relax, I’m going.” I walked to the door before looking behind me; the woman was still staring in fear but apparently not at me. I presumed there was something wrong with her and left the shop. I felt even worse by now; I was getting seriously fed up of people blanking me. I walked towards the pier, spotting my twin brother, Mike, sitting on a small wall. As I got nearer to him, I realized he wasn’t alone. His clothes were wet, he was shivering and a strange man was wrapping a blanket around his shoulders. Panic rushed through me, something must have happened to Mike! The stranger was part of an ambulance crew. A lot of people were gathered around. I didn’t know what happened but I was really upset. “Mike! What’s wrong? Are you okay?” He didn’t answer me either; he seemed to be in shock. The man with the blanket asked him something but Mike didn’t answer him. I became really agitated and flustered, I hated that I didn’t know what was going on. “What happened?” I asked someone next to me but they were already walking away. I sat next to Mike, waited with him until he was ready to talk. The crowd of people seemed to be worried too but I didn’t know why. They muttered amongst themselves, excluding me endlessly. Mike was still shivering when a policeman stepped up to talk to him. I glanced up at his face; it was so concerned and worried that I had to look away. For some reason, it upset me. “How long was she under?” he asked. Mike shrugged. The policeman nodded as if he understood. I certainly didn’t. “Mike!” a familiar voice shouted. It was my Dad, holding Laurie’s hand. What was he doing here? Mike stood and hugged my Dad tight. This was too freaky for words. “Are you alright? What happened? We’ve been worried sick about you both.” I couldn’t believe it when Mike started to cry. He gasped for air as the sobs broke his composure. “We were walking along the cliff, she…she looked over the side and lost her balance. She just fell, Dad. Just like that, there was nothing…no time…I couldn’t…” He broke down completely. My head was swimming by now. The policeman put his arm around Mike. “Sir, he told us what happened when we rescued him. He jumped straight after her but couldn’t find her. We reckon she may have landed straight on the rocks, lost consciousness and went under. She’s been in there for too long now. I…I’m sorry, but we don’t have much hope.” I stepped backwards. No. This couldn’t be right. There had to be some mistake, some trick, some elaborate joke that everyone was playing on me. I slowly lifted my hand and reached around to the insistent pain at the back of my head. A huge, gaping hole assured me that there was no joke. No mistake. It couldn’t be…but it was. Tears streamed down my face. Fear gripped me as I called my Dad but he didn’t look at me. Nobody did. How could this happen? I was young, healthy; this wasn’t meant to happen to me. Panic engulfed me but there was nowhere to run, nothing that I or anybody else could do. It had already happened. It was too late. Way too late for me now. I remembered now. Mike and I had been joking as we walked. I dared him to eat sand; he dared me to face my fear of heights. So I looked over the edge of the cliff which seemed to grow taller as I watched huge crushing waves lash against dark rocks. My body wobbled slightly as I veered forward and I lost my balance completely. I heard a loud scream, realized it was me as I gripped at nothing, desperate for something to hold onto. Mike yelled my name in hopeless panic. The fall seemed to be never ending. My stomach churned over and over, my heart pounded ferociously, my back, feet and palms were slick with sweat. There was nothing I could do; my last moments were upon me. I could only think with regret that I hadn’t hugged each and every member of my family that morning. In an instant I regretted every row, every bad vibe, and every snide comment. It was all for nothing, worth nothing. I had lost precious moments to prove points or get one up on another. I cursed my stupidity until fear and pain blanked my mind as I slammed roughly against the sharp rocks beneath me before the current held me in its unyielding grip. My skull split open but I couldn’t even register the blood that poured freely from the wound. I struggled to swim but I was losing consciousness. I might have had a chance if it wasn’t for the head wound. It dulled my senses and slowed down my reflexes. I desperately tried to kick out my arms and legs but my muscles felt like leaden jelly, I couldn’t move them voluntarily, I felt heavy yet floppy. I sank underwater. I tried to hold my breath but instinct took over too soon. My mouth opened, gasping for air but instead, I inhaled sea water. It felt like I sucked it in as it burned my lungs. I could feel myself fading, the pain of the water and the lack of oxygen was my only focus but I willed death to strike me and put me out of my misery. It only took a few seconds but it felt like it lasted forever. The end turned out to be quite peaceful. But here I stood, beside my family, still here but yet not quite here. Not living, not completely gone. There was no bright light, nothing to turn to only something to hold on to – my family. I stood with them until they found my body. They pulled it from the water later that evening. It was surreal watching them move my bloated, wasted, lifeless form. I saw my father cry and felt like a little girl again. I wanted him to take care of me. I made a choice and made my peace. When my family left – I followed them. This would be my peace.
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