BA Baracus <MR_T_A_TEAM>

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FACTS373 weeks ago
 
1. Mr. T speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is
folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the
situation, he is always understood.

2. Mr. T's pity for fools is used by mathematicians as a demonstration
of the concept of infinity.

3. There are only four horsemen of the apocalypse, because Mr. T is
going to f#cking walk.

4. You have only seen Mr. T in human form. In Narnia, he is a T. Rex
with a lion's tail hanging out of his mouth.

5. Why does Mr. T wear still have his mohawk? Cause his reflection
pities the fool who don't!

6. Mr. T invented fools. Realizing the magnitude of his folly, he then
created Pity.

7. Mr. T's sp3rm is so strong it could impregnate a man.

8. 23. That's the number of people Mr. T has pitied in the time it has
taken you to read this sentence.

9. Mr. T is allergic to doorknobs. That's why he can only kick through
doors.

10. Behind every great man, there is a great woman. Behind that woman is
Mr. T.

11. Mr. T's edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the
shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of
a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.

12. Mr. T once pitied the sun. An ice age followed.

13. In 1972 a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court
for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped a maximum
security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by
the government they survived ad soldiers of fortune, until Mr. T found
them and beat them to death with his bare hands.

14. Mr. T is not black. It's just that the sun is to afraid to shine on
him.

15. Mr. T was fired from the Psychic Friends Network for always
predicting pain.

16. Every time Mr. T pities the fool, a pornstar regains her virginity.
Then proceeds to lose it to Mr. T.

17. Before Mr. T, the alphabet only had 25 letters.

18. Mr. T remains the only bad @ss in American history to sucessfully
fire 15,000 rounds out of a gun and hit no one.

19. Despite popular belief, if there is a fool in the woods, and nobody
is around to hear his jibba jabba, Mr. T is still able to pity him.

20. The last time Mr. T went to McDonald's, Ronald McDonald greeted him.
What occured next proved to be the most violent beating of a clown ever
recorded in human history.

21. Mr. T's incredible greatness has been attributed to the fact that
his genetic code doesn't have any A, G, or C. His genetic code is in
fact, nothing but T's.

22. The glorious, blinding dazzle of Mr. T's gold chains can cure
Alzheimer's Disease. Unfortunately, the glorious, blinding dazzle of his
biceps causes it.

23. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. A bird in the hand of
Mr.T is a deadly weapon in 17 states.

24. There are now over 43 fools born every minute in order to keep up
with the rate at which Mr. T pities them.

25. Mr. T made his van go twice the speed of light because he wanted to
prove that quantum physics was a bunch of jibba jabba.

26. Revolving doors were invented to keep Mr. T from kicking them in all
the time.

27. Originally the A-Team was named T-Team and consisted of Mr. T and
six of his genetically engineered clones driving around in a van made of
pure gold. Producers changed the format after every criminal known to
man was killed in the pilot episode.

28. Mr. T took Mother Nature from behind. We refer to the event as the
Big Bang.

29. Mr. T is not really black, film is just too scared of him to fully
expose itself.

30. Mr. T obtained a diploma from established post-secondary institution
Harvard University. All he did was stand in front of a school building
with his arms crossed and nodded.
 posted by BA Baracus 

6 Comments:

Lee M said...5/12/06
 
Hilarious! Finally, all the true facts of Mr T!
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Calum Campbell said...6/5/06
 
these are comandments we should all live by
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Leo Rutter said...8/21/06
 
comical genius, as they stand we should live by theses rules as it is true T-ness. but seriously they were the best facts eva man, not meant to be read by suckers!
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Ryan Jeezy said...9/11/06
 
IF U FINK UR A TRUE RONALDINHO FAN DO MY RONALDINHO QUIZ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
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Gillz Xx said...9/17/06
 
lol - thats mad. :L Jibba Jabba :D
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Taylor Green said...12/7/06
 
dude this is fuckin awsome my rating of MR.T has gone up 100% so i dont get pittied!!!!! U CRAZY FOOL!!!!!!
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