Jennifer Hartnett <StageShifter>
| ||||
 | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
 | I couldn't help myself! | 788 days ago | ||
| ||||
| FORTY QUESTIONS YOU'VE NEVER BEEN ASKED IN A SURVEY 1. Do you know anyone in prison? I did- he may have gotten out 2. Have you ever logged onto a boyfriend/girlfriend/crush's Myspace? Nope 3. When is the last time you ate peanut butter and jelly? When I was in SC and I really wish I still was 4. Do you have a desk in your room? Nope 5. Have you ever gotten naked at a party? No! 6. What kind of car insurance do you have? All State- the feckers cost a fortune 7. Are you named after one of your parents or grandparents? Yes. Wait for it… Jennifer, after my Mother, Mary, after the Virgin, Hannah, after my GrandMother and Hartnett 8. Does your first significant other still live in the same town as you? What? As in first boyfriend? No. 9. Do you throw up gang signs? No- I was never really that cool. 10. Have you ever broken a rib? No but, my Mam did and it’s pretty terrible or she cracked it 11. Would you rather be a girl or a guy? Girl 12. Who is the most spoiled person you know? If I said- I would undoubtedly be in trouble 13. Would you rather have a million dollars or true love? Love. No –a million dollars! No! Love and half a million? OK- just the million and I’ll fancy the pants off of my butler instead 14. Have you ever had sex in church? NO NO AND NO.... Please do not tell me that people have! 15. Is your boyfriend/girlfriend a Marine? No 16. Do you watch the Grammy's? If I remember 17. Would you ever work for the border patrol? Maybe 18. Pick one word that would you describe your last relationship: Overwhelming 19. Would you rather date someone 2 years older then you or 20 years older then you? 2 20. Have you ever had a eating disorder? Oh don’t we all 21. Do you have a porn collection? No- I’ve never even seen it 22. How many proms have you been to in your life? 0- we don’t have proms in IRL 23. Have you ever been in a interracial relationship? 2 24. Is your birthday on a holiday? No but it’s a few days short of Thanksgiving 25. Are you old enough to vote? Yes and yet I can’t in CA and I’m never in IRL to vote. The answer is yes and the moral is that for me it makes no odds but, I’d surely love to 26. Do you have any friends or family in the war right now? Amy’s BF is there. 27. Are you a vegetarian? No but, I was vegan for a time and liked it 28. Do you worry about global warming? Not as much as I should but, I think that Sarah is worried enough for all of us and so, don’t put yourself out 29. Do you like polar bears? Yes- quite a lot 30. Are you Straight Edge? Pretty much 31. What kind of birth control do you use? None 32. What slang word do you call marijuana? POT 33. Are you an atheist? I have no idea what I am 34. What's your favorite part of the holidays? The part where I’m drunk with my friends 35. Did or do you think your childhood dreams will come true? I feckin hope so 36. Do you wear your sweetie's clothes? I manage to wear everyones clothes but my own which most of you know. 37. What's your opinion on gold diggers? I don’t have one! 38. Are you a country or city girl/boy? Luimneach city 39. Is your car a 2002 or higher? Yes 40. Do you floss daily? Only on special occasions. | ||||
| ||||
| 0 Comments | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| Disgrace | 788 days ago | ||
| ||||
| 1. How Old Will you be in 12 Months? 24 AHHHHHH 2. Do you think you'll be married by then? YES! (LOL) 3. What do you look forward to most in the next 3 months? It’s a secret! 4.Who was the last person to call u? My mother. 5. Who was the last person to text you? Jason 6. Do you prefer to call or text? depends on the person 7. Do you have any pets? Bevin- the feckin HAMMER. 8. What were you doing at 12 am last night? Behaving myself 9.Do you like carrots? Yup 10. When is the last time you saw your mom? June 12. How many houses have you lived in? WOW! A LOT!!!! About 12-15. 3 in the last 5 years and the remainder before I was 12. Bit of a TINKER. 13. How many city/towns have you lived in? Luimneach, Los Gatos, Santa Cruz, San Francisco. 14. Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet? I don’t know! 15. Are you a social person? Yup. 16. What was the last thing you ate? M&M’s which is not part of the plan!!!! 17. What is your favorite(s) color? Pink. 18. What are you doing for your next birthday? OMG! I have a birthday WEEK planned. Circa with the girls, Kells night out, Games night in, Cheese Cake for deserts, another Kells night and then Karla gets here! 19. What is your favorite TV show? Last Comic Standing 20. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich? Strawberry and it’s JAM not JELLY, Katie! (we’ve talked about this before) 21. Do you like coffee? like? I live on it! It’s my woman juice (what?) 22. How many glasses of water a day do you drink on average? Too many- I think I’m swamping my liver. 24. What are you listening to? People on strike outside. 25. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed? Outside 26. Do you know how to play poker? Yup.... 27. What are you thinking about? Tomorrow night 28. Any plans for this weekend? Seanies birthday, prep for Amy’s proxy wedding, Grissel is coming down and CC’s going away party- Lefty O Douls! 29. Do you eat out or at home more often? Out! 33. Have you ever been in an ambulance? Yup. 34. Do you prefer an ocean or pool? Ocean. 35. Can you drive a stick shift? No- I could but now I can’t. 37. What is your favorite thing to spend money on? clothes. 38. Do you wear any jewelry 24/7? chain my Dad gave me and my bracelet my Mam gave me.... 39. Do you speak any other language? Not fluent. 41. Who is the funniest person you know? James. 42. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? No. 44. What is the main ring tone on your phone? That stupid Beyonce song which I only added because Rachie used to love it and would start dancing when it came on. 46. What is the color of your bedroom walls? Disgusting. I think my land lord was on acid when she painted them 47. Do you shut off the water while you brush your teeth? No- I like to annoy Nicole and leave it run and go out of the room and I also turn on all the lights before she comes home because it’s so funny when she looses the plot. 48. Do you wish someone was with you right now? Ya. 49. Do you miss someone? Ya. 50. Do you talk to the person who posted this before you? Ya but not as often as we should do. | ||||
| ||||
| 0 Comments | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| Happy Birthday Oscar | 788 days ago | ||
| ||||
| The Ideal Man! Oh, the Ideal Man should talk to us as if we were goddesses, and treat us as if we were children. He should refuse all our serious requests, and gratify every one of our whims. He should encourage us to have caprices, and forbid us to have missions. He should always say much more than he means, and always mean much more than he says. He should never run down other pretty women. That would show he had no taste, or make one suspect that he had too much. No; he should be nice about them all, but say that somehow they don't attract him. If we ask him a question about anything, he should give us an answer all about ourselves. He should invariably praise us for whatever qualities he knows we haven't got. But he should be pitiless, quite pitiless, in reproaching us for the virtues that we have never dreamed of possessing. He should never believe that we know the use of useful things. That would be unforgivable. But he should shower on us everything we don't want. He should persistently compromise us in public, and treat us with absolute respect when we are alone. And yet he should be always ready to have a perfectly terrible scene, whenever we want one, and to become miserable, absolutely miserable, at a moment's notice, and to overwhelm us with just reproaches in less than twenty minutes, and to be positively violent at the end of half an hour, and to leave us for ever at a quarter to eight, when we have to go and dress for dinner. And when, after that, one has seen him for really the last time, and he has refused to take back the little things he has given one, and promised never to communicate with one again, or to write one any foolish letters, he should be perfectly broken-hearted, and telegraph to one all day long, and send one little notes every half-hour by a private hansom, and dine quite alone at the club, so that every one should know how unhappy he was. And after a whole dreadful week, during which one has gone about everywhere with one's husband, just to show how absolutely lonely one was, he may be given a third last parting, in the evening, and then, if his conduct has been quite irreproachable, and one has behaved really badly to him, he should be allowed to admit that he has been entirely in the wrong, and when he has admitted that, it becomes a woman's duty to forgive, and one can do it all over again from the beginning, with variations. A WOMAN OF NO IMPORTANCE By Oscar Wilde | ||||
| ||||
| 0 Comments | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| I should really be workin :P | 796 days ago | ||
| ||||
| The Actor Quiz: 1. NAME? Jennifer Hartnett 2. STAGE NAME? Nope 3. MOST RECENTLY SEEN IN? Stand-up comedy night at Roosters 4. WHAT DO YOU DO? Act, Stand-up comedy, clowning and improv 5. WHY DO YOU LIKE TO PERFORM? Lotsa reasons 6. WHAT’S YOUR 5 YEAR ACTOR PLAN? Move to LA, do lots of stand-up and the dream is to be on a sitcom 7. METHOD OR CLASSIC? Method. 8. FAVORITE PLAY? The Foodchain by Nicky Silver 9. FAVORITE ACTOR? Cate Blanchette 10. FAVORITE THEORIST? Richard Seyd 11. FAVORITE LINE FROM A SHOW? I actually don’t have one or else I’m just too exhausted to recall 12. YOUR DREAM ROLE IS? I would love to play PIANO ANNIE from a STAR CALLED HENRY 13. BIGGEST INSPIRATION? Everything that goes on outside my front door 14. AN AWE INSPIRING MOMENT? During a production of A MIDSUMMER NIGHTS DREAM at the REP because I just kept thinking -I could never do that. 15. SING? And ears bleed 16. DANCE? Only with a helmet 17. WHAT’S AN EASY ROLE FOR YOU? Neorotic 18. WHAT’S A DIFFICULT CHARACTER TO PLAY? Meek 19. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF MUSICAL THEATRE? I can watch it but it’s not my favourite 20. ON-STAGE OR ON-CAMERA? On-stage 21. DO YOU LOOK LIKE ANY CELEBS? Apparently, I look like Estella Warren but I don’t think so 22. IF YOU COULD WORK WITH ANY DIRECTOR WHO WOULD IT BE? Julie Taymore AUDITIONS 23. BEST? I like call-backs, I could do them all day but I’m not one for auditioning unless they just let me read or do improv. I can’t stand just doin monologues- boring! 24. WORST? DALLAS 25. MOST NERVOUS? DALLAS 26. CRAZIEST? Clowning because she made me dance whilst singing a monologue and holding a tray with rollerblades on and that’s a lot to think about 27. MOST EMBARASSING? Well it’s not my fault cause I said NO but- I was asked to sing and I said NO and so I was told to sing and I sang 99 BOTTLES of BEER and then I was asked to stop at 97 BOTTLES and kicked out. What sucked is that it was for Generals and 13 shows were being cast and I didn’t get called back for any of them but I CAN’T bloody SING! 28. YOUR LAST AUDITION? Did you get it? For Molly Bloom in Bloomsday. Yes and the show is now over. 29. ANY AUDITIONS LINED UP? Two! One on Thursday for a Plus-sized modeling ad (WHY did I agree? WHY???) and for Tir Na Nog and I’m not feeling too confident about either 30. ANY SPECIAL TALENTS? NO and I bloody hate that question. I have no stupid or quirky special talents and I’m tired of being asked REHEARSALS 31. FAVORITE THING TO DO IN REHEARSAL? Improv 32. PET PEEVE DURING REHEARSALS? People not taking it seriously 33. BIGGEST BREAKTHROUGH? Lady Anne 34. BEST REHEARSAL PROCESS? Not sure- there’s been so many and I love them all 35. WORST REHEARSAL PROCESS? Had a horrible director who was so awful and mean. He kept on stopping me, correcting my accent and giving me line readings which I FECKIN HATE and shouting at me and made me cry. HELLO???? You knew I was Irish before you cast me SHIT HEAD! 36. BEST? PDM- got to do lots of improv and my cast was really good 37. WORST? Tech rehearsal- everytime for every show. FECKIN nightmare because I’m always hungover PERFORMANCES 38. BEST PERFORMANCE OF A RUN? Opening. I don’t know actually. It always depends. Whenever we have a bigger audience, I suppose 39. WORST PERFORMANCE OF A RUN? Sunday Matinee’s are always dead and everyones hungover and always have a lousey audience 40. NERVOUS MUCH? Yup and particularly in the last year. I get a bit freaked out when doin stand-up 41. EVER BLANKED? I’ve blanked in auditions but not on-stage thank god. 42. MOST FUN YOU EVER HAD IN A SHOW? Check out- BEST CAST EVER 43. LEAD OR ENSEMBLE? Ensemble- every time! In fact, I begged my way out of a role last year to be let into a chorus because they were doing Clowning and it was BRILLIANT- I learned so much more 44. EVER BOMBED? Hmmmm. Not completely but I’ve had jokes that didn’t get a laugh during stand-up 45. BEST COSTUME? Hedda Gabler- corsette, tights and knickers! 46. WORST COSTUME? Heifna –rotten and rotten make-up 47. YOUR FAVORITE SHOW? Vagina Monologues or the Clowning Show 48. YOUR WORST SHOW? I shouldn’t say but it was pretty bad 49. AUDIENCE INTERACTION? Yes! Always! 50. BEST AUDIENCE REACTION? Improv show –can’t even remember the name but it was so mad that I could barely remember what happened. Such a laugh. 51. WORST AUDIENCE REACTION? Got called a BITCH during a show cause I was playing a bitchy character OR actually, when my Father showed up with Helen and sat in the front row of LEAVING HOME. I had to kiss someone on stage and the entire time I was kissing him all I could hear was my Father “Jesus! Jesus Christ! Helen? Jesus Helen? Helen, have they stopped?” FUN STUFF 52. WOULD YOU DO A REALITY TV SHOW? No 53. WOULD YOU DO A NUDEY SCENE? For all the right reasons and if Lipo and a boob job was provided 54. BEST ON-STAGE KISS? Dan 55. EVER BEEN DRUNK ON-STAGE? Ya! but the show was at midnight and I’d already done 4 shows that day and it was only a few beers and nothing bad happened. OH and there was another time. OOOPS! I drank a double vodka before my first stand-up comedy show because I thought it would help my nerves but it really didn’t- I just got extra paranoid because I kept thinking that I was too drunk and would forget my script. Now, that was a really stupid idea. But, the drink was free! 56. MOST EMBARASSING ON-STAGE MOMENT? I was walkin on stage and stepping up onto the stage and I stood on my skirt and fell forward on to the stage with my skirt now hanging off. MORTAFIED, I was. 57. EVER DATED ANYONE YOU WERE IN A SHOW WITH? Yup. Twice and I’m still friends with them 58. EVER CAUGHT NAKED IN THE DRESSING ROOM? No 59. EVER MADE OUT WITH YOUR DIRECTOR/STAGE MANAGER OR THE LIKE? Just a kiss- where’s the harm? 60. BIGGEST REGRET? tbd | ||||
| ||||
| 0 Comments | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| Who Would Waste the Vodka? | 808 days ago | ||
| ||||
| Who the heck knew it did all this!!!! 1. To remove a bandage painlessly, saturate the bandage with vodka. The solvent dissolves adhesive. 2. To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers, fill trigger-spray bottle with vodka, spray the caulking, let set five minutes and wash clean. The alcohol in the vodka kills mold and mildew 3. To clean your eyeglasses, simply wipe the lenses with a soft, clean cloth dampened with vodka. The alcohol in the vodka cleans the glass and kills germs. 4. Prolong the life of razors by filling a cup with vodka and letting your safety razor blade soak in the alcohol after shaving. The Vodka disinfects the blade and prevents rusting. 5. Spray vodka on vomit stains, scrub with a brush, and then blot dry. 6. Using a cotton ball, apply vodka to your face as an astringent to cleanse the skin and tighten pores. 7. Add a jigger of vodka to a 12-ounce bottle of shampoo. The alcohol cleanses the scalp, removes toxins from hair, and stimulates the growth of healthy hair. 8. Fill a sixteen-ounce trigger-spray bottle and spray bees or wasps to kill them. 9. Pour one-half cup vodka and one-half cup water in a Ziploc freezer bag and freeze for a slushy, refresh- able ice pack for aches, pain or black eyes. 10. Fill a clean, used mayonnaise jar with freshly packed lavender flowers, fill the jar with vodka, seal the lid tightly and set in the sun for three days. Strain liquid through a coffee filter, then apply the tincture to aches and pains. 11. To relieve a fever, use a washcloth to rub vodka on your chest and back as a liniment. 12. To cure foot odor, wash your feet with vodka. 13. Vodka will disinfect and alleviate a jellyfish sting. 14. Pour vodka over an area affected with poison ivy to remove the urushiol oil from your skin. 15. Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth Allow your gums to absorb some of the alcohol to numb the pain. And BRANIAC here like- - - I've only been drinking the stuff | ||||
| ||||
| 0 Comments | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| "Can YOU answer 22 questions about YOUR #2?" | 816 days ago | ||
| ||||
| Can YOU answer 22 questions about YOUR number 2? DON'T change your top friends, and answer 22 questions about the 2nd person in your top friends. 1) What's their name? Ann-Marie Healey Claridge (Tino). WHATEVER!!! 2) Where did you meet them? The Maternity Hospital Luimneach, we’re two days apart in age, we’ve lived across the road from each other most of our lives, went to the same school and she’s still my BFF . 3) What was your age when you first met? I was a BA-BY. 4) What don’t you like about this person? She’s a FECKIN flake- she’d leave me ANYWHERE waitin for her… She’ll be late for her own funeral! 5) How long have you known them? And what’s your earliest memory together? 23 years and 10 months. Drawing rainbows in her sitting room with John when we were chislers 6) Is this person older then you? No- two days younger. 7) When was the last time you saw this person? Crimbo .  What’s the best thing about this person?That she’s my friend for life and I can trust her with anything. 9) Are you related to this person? No but may as well be- she eats us out of house and home and robs my stuff so YA. 10) Do you have nicknames for each other? I call her TINO and she calls me GORGEOUS. 11) Is that person bringing sexy back? When she remembers to do her roots LOL. 12) Do you think this person will repost this? YUP but not about me because I’m #1 on her friends list 13) What would you do for this person? Um… pretty much anything- GOD knows I’ve carried her home enough times 14) Have you seen this person cry? YUP- she’d cry at the bloody ads! 15) What’s the craziest thing you’ve seen this person do? Don’t think I should put it on the internet. 16) Do you tell them a lot about your life? EVERYTHING 17) Doing anything with them tonight? NO but maybe if she’d copped on a bit and saved a little harder she’d be here now and I wouldn’t be doin this STUPID survey. 1 What sticks out in your head or comes to mind when you think of this person?UM- just how lucky I am to have such a brilliant friend and how much I miss her and wish I was at home so I could be with my pals- TINO is a treasure!! 19) Would you have them at your wedding? She’ll probably be my Brides maid at all my weddings when I marry Jack Black (hubbie #1 for the laugh), Daniel Day Lewis (Hubby #2 for the intensity of it), Brad Pitt (so I can say so), and TBD ??!!! 20) How would this person describe you? UMMMMM! MY FRIEND JENN WHO LIVES IN AMERICA, FUNNY, GORGEOUS, INTELLIGENT, MARVELOUS ACTRESS, CHARMING, SEXY, GLAMOROUS, A REAL LADY, GREAT TASTE, SOPHISTICATED, CLASSY… (Tino is great for my self esteem that’s why I keep her around LIKE) LOL 21) What's something this person is obsessed with? SEAMUS. 22) Your best memory together? Hmmmmm JAYSUS that’s a toughie... Probably our big fight in Supermacs at 3AM and Tino lying down on the road outside in O’ Connell street in front of my neighbour and wouldn’t get into a cab- FECKIN things I do for her OR the Canaries was a bit MAD or KILKEE the night in Neptunes or the time she fell into the bush and wouldn’t get out. I don’t know- there’s been so many. Repost this as: "Can YOU answer 22 questions about YOUR #2?" | ||||
| ||||
| 0 Comments | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| I should have gone to the gym | 817 days ago | ||
| ||||
| 1. What’s you name? Jennifer! 2. What's bothering you right now? That I didn’t go to the gym! 3. Relationship status? BORING!. 4. What is in your wallet? Money, receipts, photos of the girls and the kids, MUNI pass and a check book! 5. Wallpaper on your computer's desktop? photos of the lads  7. Do you ever feel like you try really hard and nothing comes from it? No. Something always comes of it- maybe not what I want though 8. What do you want in your life right now? Consistency! 9. Listening to? Pages turning 10. Have you ever kissed anyone named Patty? As in PATRICK or PAT... I don’t know- maybe 11. What do you smell like? Laundry 12. Eating/chewing? no 13. What's your favorite thing to have on your bed? hahhahaha! 14. Do you believe in a soul mate? Yup 15. What do you wear to bed? T-shirt 16. Do you remember your dreams? Yup. 17. Who will you sleep with tomorrow? Nobody. 18. Have you ever been gambling? Yes 19. What's something you wish you could understand better? Irish at the moment which is what I should be doin right now 20. What did you do last weekend? And what will you do this weekend? I went to Chicago and drank a lot and watched my boys and shopped and other stuff I won’t be revealing. This weekend I’m driving to Santa Barbara with Amy and Nicole for a girly weekend. NO MORE DRINKIN! 21. Who do you miss? My Mam, Sean, and Rachel, and Ella when I’m in SF and the girls OBVIOUSLY 22. Who is the last person you hugged? Sinead, I think. 23. Orange or apple juice? Orange 24. Who was the last person you went somewhere with? Sinead. 26. Have you kissed someone on your top friends? Yes! 27. Next time you will have sex? when i'm married 28. What was the last thing you drank? Vitamin water 29. Whose house did you go to last night? Mine 30. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? Amy- AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH 31. Do you like someone right now? not so much. A lil bit. But there’s no point 32. Are you bored? hence, the survey. I’m bloody waiting for my roommate to listen to me talk in Irish and she’s taking FOREVER 33. What is the last movie you watched? With who? I can’t remember but I’m watchin one later with Teena 34. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink: coffee, diet coke, water 35. What are you excited about? Karla comin in November, James comin at some point, this weekend in Santa Barbara!!! OH CRIMBO in Ireland!!!! 36. Do you want someone you can't have? NOPE. 37. Who was last to slap your butt? OH GOD! NOT TELLIN  38. Where was the last place you went? hahahah outside my house for a fag listening to James shout down the phone at me because he’s in Greece and HAMMERED. 39. What's on your mind right now? Replaying the weekend! 40. Have you cried recently? nope! 41. If an unstoppable force comes across an unmovable object, then what happens? A row with my Dad 42. Is taking a shower a daily habit? why yes. Sometimes twice daily! 43. What products do you use in the shower? several 44. How many times have you been to Disney World? once... it was grand. 45. Are you reading any books right now? which ones? Blink for my book club and Tir Na Nog for an audition I have coming up 46. What does your dad look like? Me –well most of ye know him 47. What was your favorite band when you were in seventh grade? Are you 14 in Seventh grade? Then probs um… Second year- Cranberries maybe? 48. Do you like Swedish Fish? I don’t really know. 49. What movie can you watch over and over, and it will never get old? Interview with a Vampire. 50. Are you craving anything? another cigarette! 51. Who is the man/woman of your dreams? There is none at the moment- didn’t I already say that??? 52. Who’s the funniest person you know? JAMES Mc MAHON- in fact I’m still bloody laughing at him 53. Kiss anyone recently? Who? When? Where? UHUH! Not telling. A certain someone but lets just say he was tall dark and bloody GORGEOUS. Definitely not telling that part 54. One wish? Contentment. Actually NO- good health for my family and friends 55. who is your BFF? Big Friendly Fondler? LOL! Um.. don’t have one- Jess, Tino, Karla, Nicole, Jenn, Ail, Amy, Natalie, James (both of em), Sarah, Darrin… | ||||
| ||||
| 0 Comments | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| Waskally Widdle Wabbit | 825 days ago | ||
| ||||
| VERY RUDE BUT very good! Approach with caution. Niall Subject: FW: Waskally Widdle Wabbit A little girl goes to a pet shop and asks "excuthe me do you have any widdle wabbits?" The shopkeepers heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he Is on her level and says "do you want a widdle white wabbit or a thoft fwuffy bwack wabbit, or one like that widdle bwown one over there?" The little girl blushes, rocks back on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and whispers, " I don't wealy fink my pyfon Gives a phuc." | ||||
| ||||
| 0 Comments | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| Subject: FW: WHEN YOU'RE FEELING STUPID, READ THIS | 825 days ago | ||
| ||||
| (On September 17, 1994, Alabama's Heather Whitestone was selected as Miss America 1995.) Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever," -- Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest . `````````````````````````````````` "Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." --Mariah Carey ```````````` "Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life," -- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become Spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign . ``````````````````````````````````````` `````````` "I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body," -- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward . ! ``````````````````````````````````````` `````` "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country," --Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC . ``````````````````````````````````````` `````````` "That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it," --A congressional candidate in Texas . ```````````````````````````` "Half this game is ninety percent mental." --Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark `````````````````````````````````` "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it." --Al Gore, Vice President ``````````````````` "I love California . I practically grew up in Phoenix ." -- Dan Quayle `````````` "We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need ?" --Lee Iacocca ``````````` "The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." - --Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst. ``````````````````````````````````````` ````` "We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people." -- Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instrutor . ````````````````````````````````` "Traditionally, most of Australia 's imports come from overseas." --Keppel Enderbery ```````````````` "Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances." --Department of Social Services, Greenville , South Carolina ``````````````````````````````````````` ````` "If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record." --Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Feeling smarter yet? | ||||
| ||||
| 0 Comments | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| No longer a student: | 1254 days ago | ||
| ||||
| I graduated! What do people do with Theatre Arts Degrees? This is my question... I have no stable job in my future however, I am a certified clown! Again, I am a certified clown... If anyone would like to hire a clown- please call me- I'm available for all your theatre needs! | ||||
| ||||
| 0 Comments | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
Advertisement