Laura Lythall <lil_laura_l>
"This is it"
|Im good but could be better||2/12/08|
|Although i am actually feeling pretty good at the moment and things are relativly going to plan, i wish that things could move faster and that i could do something right know than having to wait but then again im sure that the wait will be worth it.|
A few things have come up recently which have been really great for certain people the only problem is the fact that everything their doing know i could have done if only circumstances had been different. It makes me literally sick to the stomach not to be a part of what i should be apart of if you get my meaning. Its just so god damn annoying if possibly 2 or even 1 event didnt happen i would be sorted and probably would have already done everything and achieved everything that others are getting now. Please dont get me wrong i couldnt be happier for them im just jealous and for me to be jealous is saying something.
However it may take me longer and i may not get the orignal awards/acheivements that i wanted but i will undoubtedly show all those mother truckers who think im good for nothing, a waster or dumb that actually i can probably not only impress you but be a hell of a lot better than you then again i already am so too bad.
i feel better now ive written this down so just ignore pretty much all of it lol.
mind you if i was to hear anyone slagging me off or saying that im any of the above without due cause i will sadly resort to extremes...
|well its a new year||1/4/08|
|I cant believe ive actually managed to stay sane through the last year and im pretty sure that there were points when i certainly wasnt sane but somehow i managed to get through a considerably bad year for me smiling. Although i have to admit that 2007 certainly wasnt the greatest year of my life and quite possibly the worst so far that doesnt mean that it didnt have its very good points which are too many for me to say here. I owe my close friends many thanks for this because without those who helped me when times were bad and those that made me laugh and forget everything happening in the world around it could have been i much worse year.|
However it is the start of a new year and i couldnt be better to be honest its time to stop dwelling on the what ifs of last year and look to the future. My year ahead should be one of the best of my life although pretty hard im gonna be working loads to save up for travelling but so long as ive got the same people close to me throughout the year im sure that whatever happens it will be a good one.
happy new year all and thankyou
|*.WHAT WoULD YoOH Do iiF.*|
ii MAD3 A MoV3 oN YoOH:
ii KiiSS3D YoOH:
ii LiiV3D N3XT DoOR To YoOH:
ii START3D SMoKiiNG:
ii ASK3D YoOH oN A DAT3:
ii WAS HoSPiiTALiiZ3D:
ii RAN AWAY FRoM HoM3:
ii GoT iiN To A FiiGHT AND YoOH W3R3N'T TH3R3?
*.WHAT Do YoOH THiiNK ABoUT MY.*
*.HAV3 YoOH 3V3R.*
Lii3D To M3 To MAK3 M3 F33L B3TT3R?
WANT3D To KiiSS M3?
WANT3D To KiiLL M3?
BRoK3 MY H3ART?
K3PT SoM3THiiNG iiMPoRTANT FRoM M3?
B3 MY FRii3ND?
well im working loads at the mo and when i mean loads i mean e7 days a week doing roughly 60 hrs a week. this is good but im getting very tired just making sure i rmember that im doing this cos i wanna go travelling and that generally keeps me motivated.
cos of work not had much time to see as much of the people i wanna see as id like but i dont know how much longer my agency is gonna have this much work so gotta make the most of it. i am however missing some people so hey to those i havnt spoken to in a while.
generally things are going pretty well ive got what iv been wanting for the past few months but for some reason theres still a certain part of me that feels empty and i dont why... well i do know why but i also know its against my better judgement to pursue it
|blah blah blah lol dunno what to say bord slightly tipsy lol|
to be honest i really wish i was a cat with absolutly nothing to worry me
or i dunno just wish i was sum1 other den me yeup dats it argh blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blahb lahb oops kinda went mashed but newaz cant remember what i was actuall donna write here so bye bye
|wooooooo i gots a job!!!! only part time but still man its hope n a bit of money at da end of the week and it gives sum experience|
|it is... 03:14 hrs on the dot and yet again im round my mates house n cant sleep so on the internet. so far ive applied for a load of jobs onine, looked in to gap year stuff, and looked up ma name on google was nuff kl lol.|
now im bored and cant sleep cos theres so much going through my head at the moment.
firstly the fact that i want i job so badly and that i know if i got the chance i'll be able to do any type of job well if somebody would just give me the chance but it hasnt happened yet but im still trying which leads me onto ma second point my urge to go travelling i desperatly want to go and see the world and experience new things and see different cultures basically something different from where i am now i want to learn about something other than the shit hole that london is. which again leads me on nicely to my third point im getting so bored of the way certain people are and how they act the ignorance and imaturity of some people is unbelievable! sometimes i dont understand how people can be so stupid and do or say stupid things or how incredibly ignorant people are to the world around them they think they are the only people that have problems or they have no vision or yearning to get out of the bubble they live and do something! ... but i guess thats just people. fourthly i've been thinking about life in general and the fact that i know what i want to do ( get a job, save money, go travelling, come back join RAF or do a degree or become outdoor activity instructor) i what i need to do it ( a job, research, and dedication to plans) and i know how to do it ( apply to as many jobs as pos, do all of the said before) so why isnt it happening! im finding it so hard to keep applying to jobs that either dont reply at all or reject me on the grounds that i have no experience but how can i if no one will employ me its just one big circle. other than that ive made some important decisions tonight that have been really hard to make and have hurt alot but they are the right decisions and that life is best this way.
it is now 4 15 and im not tired at all so i might just ramble some more as no1s awake and i cant have anymore cigarettes hhhmmmm well i wanna play playstation actually i might play games online ha ha ive found something better to occupy my boredom so goodbye my evil friend!
(yes i am very tired and bored right now)
( i really think that i should stop writing now but its kinda like talking to someone lol)
|well im going to say two words about happenings on a certain night basically skinny dipping... southend... lol interesting|
anyway enough about that subject you will never believe it guys but i have actually won an award for administering first aid!!!! love it its something like lifesaver of the year award dont know exactly what that means but hey me of all people got an award for helping injured people lol.
other things happening at the mo... erm still looking for a job still without success, date to keep free btw 29th september gonna be having another "gathering" at ma yard should be good and there is going to be a theme not to sure what yet possibly pimps and hoes, beach party or underwear party lol. anyways will get back to yas on that.
Other than that theres not really much happening in ma life at da mo apart from two things that im not gonna go into detail with here but it makes my life ssssooooooooo complicated.
|got back from my third germany camp yesterday. As always it was pretty different from da first one but still loadsa fun.|
Missing the pirates loads!!!!!! sophie aka Iron Fist, Charlie aka mad eye moomie and jade aka craken spandex. Love the names mine was Chimmers/ chimmer me timbers for obvious reasons lol.
Anyway really wish i was still there to be honest or well newhere but where i am at the moment i came back with a great new enthusiastic attitude and i really dont wanna loose it but i feel that its slowly being drained from me minute by minute whilst in my current enviroment
|99 questions !!||7/25/07|
|1. Name: Laura Charlotte Lythall|
2. Nicknames: erm... pyro, lau, lar, dont really have ne nowadays i dont think.
4. Place of Birth: all saints, kent.
5. Zodiac Sign: Taurus
6. Male or Female: Female
7. Occupation: unemployed! but looking
8. Residence: penthouse in wapping. (also known as 3rd floor council masionette in wapping)
9. Screen Name: lil-lau
+ My Appearance
12. Hair Color: chesnut brown
13. Hair Length: mid length
14. Eye color: blue
15. Best Feature: eyes n teeth
16. Height: 5'6"
17. Braces?: no no no! never had em either
18. Glasses?: nope but think im going blind... seriously!
19. Piercing: nope none ears healed up.
20. Tattoos: not yet
21. Righty or Lefty: righty
+ My 'Firsts'
22. First best friend: Leah Barker!
23. First Award: erm i really dont know gotta admit ive had alot of awards especially when i was younger, it was probs sumat to do wid football
24. First Sport You Joined: Football
26. First Real Vacation: erm barbados i think
27. First Concert: not been to one yet!!!! well apart from da disney kids awards
28. First True Love: dont think ive had i true love yet...
29. Movie: erm kill bill or battle royale
30. TV Show: simpsons
31. Colors: blue or black
34. Song: oohhhh hard one... erm... he he bollocks to the officers
36. Candy: dairy milk
37. Sports to Play: football and volleyball!!!
38. Restaurant: erm does PFC count lol
41. College: was bishop challoner
43. Book: The Beach loved it
45. Shoes: Converse
46. Feeling: confused
47. Single or Taken?: taken
49. Eating: nothing wouldnt mind eatin sumat tho lol
50. Drinking: coke
51. Typing: everything lol
52. Online: what do you think
53. Listening To: radio 1
54. Thinking About: what im gonna do bout ma life at da mo
55. Wanting: to know what to do bout ma life lol
56. Watching: erm me typing
57. Wearing: tracksuit
58. Want Kids?: dunno probs not can u really imagine anutha laura in the world
59. Want to be Married: if i find the right person but at the end of the day its just a piece of paper
60. Careers in Mind: RAF, air traffic controller or outdoor activities instructor
61. Where do you want to live?: anywhere but east london
+ Which is Better With The Opposite Sex?
63. Hair color: erm brownish blond
64. Hair length: not to short not to long
65. Eye color: blue
66. Size: well built i like to feel protected gone off skinny boys lol
67. Cute or sexy: both
68. Lips or Eyes: defo eyes
69. Hugs or Kisses: hugs there more meaningful
70. Short or Tall: tall defo
71. Easygoing or serious: easy going but serious at times cos sometimes i need controlling lol
72. Romantic or Spontaneous: spontaneous but romantics good to just not to much
74. Sensitive or Loud: both
75. Hook-up or Relationship: hhhmmmm depends
77. Trouble Maker or Hesitant One: trouble maker
+Have I ever?
78. Kissed a Stranger: erm yeah lol
79. Had Alcohol: nope... ok maybe ocasionally lol
80. Smoked: yeah fraid so
81. Ran Away From Home: all the time lol
82. Broken a bone: yes ma lil toe!!! and ma big toe
83. Got an X-ray: quite a few times
85. Broken Someone's Heart: twice i think. sorry but it wasnt without reason on both counts
86. Broke Up With Someone: yeap
87. Cried When Someone Died: Yeap
88. Cried At School: erm, not to sure think i mighta done
+ Do I Believe In?
89. God: no
90. miracles: never had experience of them
91. Love At First sight: never no until it happens
92. Ghosts: yeup
93. Aliens: defo how can we be the only intelligent life forms in such a huge universe
94. Soul Mates: i think so.
95. Heaven: not the common theory of heaven but to make things simple i do believe in a type of heaven
96. Hell: as above
98. Kissing on The First Date: dont really have dates and i woulda probs kissed them already neway lol
99. Horoscopes: erm there interesting to read