Karina Salliss <karina451>

Five Levels of Hangovers5/7/07
 

One Star Hangover (*)
No pain. No real feeling of illness. You're able to function relatively well. However, you are still parched. You can drink 5 cokes and still feel this way. For some reason, you are craving a MacDonald's.

Two Star Hangover (**)
No pain, but something is definitely amiss. You may look OK, but you have the mental capacity of a staple gun. The coffee you are chugging is only increasing your rumbling gut, which is still tossing around the pastry from the 3:00 AM Kebab House excursion. There is some definite havoc being wreaked upon your bowels.

Three Star Hangover (***)
Slight headache. Stomach feels crappy. You are definitely not productive. Anytime a girl walks by you gag because her perfume reminds you of the flavored schnapps shots your alcoholic friends dared you to drink. Life would be better right now if you were home in your bed watching Eastenders repeats. You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 3 iced teas and a diet Coke - yet you haven't peed once.

Four Star Hangover (****)
Life sucks. Your head is throbbing. You can't speak too quickly or else you might puke. Your boss has already lambasted you for being late and has given you a lecture for reeking of booze. You wore nice clothes, but that can't hide the fact that you only shaved one side of your face. For the ladies, it looks like you put your make-up on while riding the bumper cars. Your eyes look like one big red vein, and even your hair hurts. Your arse is in perpetual spasm, and the first of about eight shits you take during the day brings water to the eyes of everyone who enters the bathroom.

Five Star Hangover (*****)
You have a second heartbeat in your head, which is actually annoying the employee who sits next to you. Vodka vapor is seeping out of every pore and making you dizzy. You still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your mouth from brushing your teeth. Your body has lost the ability to generate spit so your tongue is suffocating you. You don't have the foggiest idea who the hell the stranger was passed out in your bed this morning. Any attempt to take a shit results in a fire hose like discharge of alcohol-scented fluid with a rare 'Floater' thrown in. The sole purpose of this 'Floater' seems to be to splash the toilet water all over your Arse. Death sounds pretty good right about now.

 1 Comment 
ME4/7/07
 
1. Who Are You?
2. Are We Friends?
3. When And How Did We Meet?
4. Do You Have A Crush On Me?
5. Do Ya Think I"m FIT?
6. Would You Kiss Me?
7. Give Me A Nickname And Explain Why?
8. Describe Me In 3 Words?
9. What Was Your First Impression Of Me?
10. Do You Still Think The Same?
11. What Reminds You Of Me?
12. If You Could Give Me Anything What Would It Be?
13. How Well Do You Know me?
14. What Do You Like Best about Me?
15. Ever Wanted To Tell Me Something You Couldn"t?
16. Are You Going To Put This On Your Blog And See What I Say About You?
 3 Comments 
Racism 2/20/07
 

*R?c?s?* A black man walked in a cafe and the white man said, "coloured people are not allowed here". The black man turned around and stood up. He then said, " listen sir...when i was born i was black, when i grew up i was black, when i'm sick i'm black, when i go in the sun i'm black, when i'm cold i'm black, when i'll die i'll be black..but you sir... when you were born you were pink, when you grew up you were white, when you're sick you go green, when you go in the sun you go red, when you're cold you go blue and when you die you will go purple. And you have the nerve to call me coloured?!" The black man sat down and the white man walked away... {Put this on your Bebo if you hate racism.}
 1 Comment